Rock Lyrics, Man! It’s Deeper Than a Kardashian’s Vocabulary

Parker

You ever listen to Pink Floyd and think, 'Damn, I should have studied philosophy in college instead of binge-watching Friends?' Their lyrics are so deep, you feel like you're taking an existential journey every time you play 'Time.' Like, 'Ten years have got behind you'? Who knew aging could sound so poetic?

Parker

And then there's 'Comfortably Numb.' I mean, have you ever been so emotionally detached that you needed a 10-minute guitar solo to feel anything? That's what I call therapy, folks. But seriously, if you ever feel like you're losing it, just put on Pink Floyd and remember, you’re not alone in your existential dread.

Parker

Hey, audience, who here has ever used a Pink Floyd lyric to impress their philosophy professor? Come on, raise your hands! You know, 'We don't need no education' might just be the most profound statement about the futility of formal learning I’ve ever heard.

Sou

The Beatles, man, they started with 'Love Me Do' and ended up writing 'A Day in the Life.' It’s like they went from high school poetry to a full-blown Shakespearean play. And all in under a decade! You ever tried to evolve that fast? I tried to grow a beard once, and it took me three years just to get past stubble.

Sou

But seriously, 'Eleanor Rigby' is a masterpiece. 'All the lonely people, where do they all come from?' I mean, who hasn’t asked themselves that while scrolling through Instagram? It’s like they predicted the rise of social media and its impact on loneliness. Or maybe they just had a lot of free time?

Sou

Hey, audience, quick question—what’s the most Beatles song you’ve ever used in a breakup text? 'Let It Be'? 'Something'? 'I Want to Hold Your Hand'? Because I once sent a whole paragraph of 'A Day in the Life,' and it just made things more confusing.

Parker

Nirvana, the voice of a lost generation. Kurt Cobain’s lyrics are like a diary entry from a teenager who’s already seen too much. 'Smells Like Teen Spirit'—I mean, 'Here we are now, entertain us'? That’s the anthem of every bored teenager ever. And I was one of them!

Parker

And 'Lithium'? That song is so deep, it’s like a therapy session set to music. 'I find it hard, it’s hard to find, oh well, I’m gonna leave again.' It’s like he’s saying, 'I don’t know what I’m doing, but I’m gonna keep doing it.' Can anyone relate to that? Because that’s my life motto.

Parker

Audience, who here has ever played 'Something in the Way' while feeling super emo? Come on, I know I’m not the only one. That song is like a lullaby for the homeless and the heartbroken. But hey, at least it’s better than 'My Heart Will Go On'—that’s just depressing.

Sou

Bob Dylan, the poet of rock. His lyrics are so full of imagery and metaphor, you feel like you need a decoder ring to understand them. 'The Weight'—'Take a load off, Fanny'? I mean, who is Fanny, and why does she need a break? Is this a subliminal message about taking a load off in general? Maybe it’s a metaphor for life’s burdens.

Sou

And 'I Shall Be Released'—it’s like he’s singing a prayer for freedom. 'Any day now, any day now, I shall be released.' I once used that line to convince my girlfriend to let me out of a bad relationship. Didn’t work, but I tried.

Sou

Hey, audience, who here has ever tried to write a song as poetic as Bob Dylan? I once wrote 'The Weight of My Wallet' and thought I was a genius. Turns out, it just made me sound like a broke guy with a bad case of the DTs.

Parker

Radiohead—now, they’re the kings of abstract artistry. Their lyrics are so layered, you need a Ph.D. in Literary Analysis to fully appreciate them. 'Paranoid Android'—'Ambition makes you look pretty ugly, kicking and screaming, Gucci little piggy.' Is this a critique of materialism, or just an excuse to wear more Gucci?

Parker

And 'No Surprises'? 'A heart that’s full up like a landfill.' I mean, that’s a perfect description of my inbox. But it’s also a pretty good metaphor for emotional numbness. Thom Yorke, you sneaky genius.

Parker

Hey, audience, who here can recite the entire 'How to Disappear Completely' without looking it up? I once tried to do it in a bar, and the bartender just gave me a free drink and said, 'Go home and write a book.' So, I did. It’s called 'How to Disappear Completely Without a Trace, and Maybe a Kidney.'

Sou

The Rolling Stones—rebellion and swagger, but not always profound. 'Paint It Black' is deep, sure, but it’s also the theme song for every emo kid who’s ever worn black eyeliner. And 'Gimme Shelter'? It’s like they’re saying, 'Life is a mess, and we need a safe place to hide.' Sounds about right, doesn’t it?

Sou

But you know, they had their moments. 'Wild Horses' is a beautiful song, but it’s also the perfect soundtrack for a midlife crisis. 'I’d rather be any place than in this place tonight.' I mean, who hasn’t felt that way after a bad date?

Sou

Audience, who here has ever used a Rolling Stones lyric to justify a wild night out? 'You can’t always get what you want, but if you try sometimes, you just might find, you get what you need.' That’s the ultimate excuse for why you shouldn’t plan your life too much. Am I right?

Parker

Led Zeppelin—mystical, yes, but not always profound. 'Stairway to Heaven' is a classic, but it’s also the perfect song to play when you’re trying to convince someone you’re a wizard. 'There’s a lady who’s sure all that glitters is gold / And she’s buying a diamond ring.' I mean, she’s not wrong, but she’s also a bit materialistic, don’t you think?

Parker

And 'Ramble On'—it’s like they’re telling a story about Middle Earth, but with a bit more rock and roll. 'Out on the ocean, sailing away / To find a land, of mist and snow.' I once tried to write a fantasy novel, and it ended up sounding like a Led Zeppelin outtake. At least I didn’t get sued for plagiarism.

Parker

Hey, audience, who here has ever used 'Ramble On' to avoid doing their homework? 'I’m off to find a land of mist and snow.' That’s a much better excuse than 'My dog ate it,' right?

Sou

Queen—grand, theatrical, and sometimes a bit playful. 'Bohemian Rhapsody' is a classic, but it’s also the most confusing song ever written. 'Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy?' I mean, who hasn’t asked themselves that while staring at their reflection in the mirror at 3 AM?

Sou

And 'The Show Must Go On'? 'I’ll keep fighting from the moment I wake / From the bottom of my soul.' I once used this line to motivate myself to clean my apartment. It didn’t work. I just ended up singing it at the top of my lungs and throwing my socks at the wall.

Sou

Hey, audience, who here has ever used a Queen lyric to start a karaoke night? Come on, 'We Are the Champions' is the ultimate confidence booster. Unless you’re actually a champion, in which case, you’re just being modest.

Parker

The Doors—poetic and a bit trippy. 'The End' is a haunting piece, but it’s also the perfect soundtrack for a bad trip. 'Father, I want to kill you / Mother, I want to... uh, well, you know.' I mean, that’s deep, but it’s also a bit disturbing. Jim Morrison, you were really something.

Parker

And 'Riders on the Storm'? 'There she goes, and my heart turns to stone.' I once used this line to describe my feelings after watching a horror movie. Turns out, it’s not the best way to comfort someone who’s scared.

Parker

Hey, audience, who here has ever used a Doors lyric to describe a particularly rough breakup? 'Love her madly, give her all she asks for / She will steal your soul away.' That’s the truth, folks. Love can be a thief.

Sou

David Bowie—the chameleon of rock. His lyrics were groundbreaking, but often more conceptual than personal. 'Life on Mars?' 'Is there life on Mars? / It’s funny / But I’m sure that I’ve had dreams of it.' I mean, who hasn’t had dreams of Mars? Especially after watching one too many sci-fi movies.

Sou

And 'Space Oddity'—'Ground Control to Major Tom / Your circuit’s dead, there’s something wrong.' I once used this line to describe my Wi-Fi connection. 'Ground Control to Major Wi-Fi, your circuit’s dead, there’s something wrong.' It’s a bit dramatic, but it’s also accurate.

Sou

Hey, audience, who here has ever dressed up as Ziggy Stardust for Halloween? I mean, have you ever seen a more iconic rock persona? And did you use any of his lyrics to describe your costume? 'I’m a starman, and I’m gonna blow your mind.' That’s the perfect Halloween greeting.

Parker

U2—emotionally powerful, but not always complex. 'Sunday Bloody Sunday' is a powerful song about political turmoil. 'Don’t cry for me, Argentina / I’m not that girl anymore.' Wait, no, that’s not right. But you get the point. Bono writes some of the most anthemic and emotionally charged lyrics out there.

Parker

And 'One'? 'Is the loneliest number that you’ll ever do / Two can be as bad as one.' I mean, have you ever felt so lonely that you started singing this song to your cat? 'We get to share the night / But we’re so lonesome in the day.' My cat just looked at me and walked away. Guess even felines need a break from existential dread.

Parker

Hey, audience, who here has ever used a U2 lyric to propose to their significant other? 'I still haven’t found what I’m looking for.' That’s a bit of a risky move, isn’t it? But hey, it worked for me. She said yes, and now we’re happily married and still haven’t found what we’re looking for. True love, folks.

Sou

Pearl Jam—deep, but more personal. 'Jeremy'—'He’s a self-destructive little boy / With attention problems.' I mean, have you ever felt like you were writing a song about yourself? 'Black'—'All that is good and bad, I define, I confine.' That’s the ultimate statement of personal struggle and acceptance. But it’s also a great way to impress your therapist.

Sou

And 'Alive'—'I am now / I am now / I am born, I am torn, I am driven.' I mean, have you ever felt so alive that you just had to sing this song at the top of your lungs? I did, and now my neighbors think I’m a motivational speaker. Or a madman. Jury’s still out on that one.

Sou

Hey, audience, who here has ever used a Pearl Jam lyric to write a suicide note? Just kidding! But seriously, who here has ever quoted 'Black' in a particularly dark moment? 'I don’t know why, don’t know how, I got to keep it inside.' Because sometimes, you just need to feel seen and heard.

Parker

Radiohead—masters of melancholic introspection. 'Exit Music (For a Film)'—'My iron’s rusting / And I’m trying to write this song / I’ve got cottonmouth / I’m breathing funny.' I mean, have you ever felt so stressed that you couldn’t even finish a sentence? That’s Radiohead in a nutshell.

Parker

And 'Fake Plastic Trees'—'Anyone who had a heart to lend / I would have borrowed it, I would have borrowed it.' I once used this line to describe my feelings about a plastic surgery clinic. 'Anyone who had a heart to lend, I would have borrowed it, but nothing’s for free in this world.'

Parker

Hey, audience, who here has ever used a Radiohead lyric to describe their feelings about social media? 'I’m not here / This isn’t happening.' Because sometimes, the internet feels like a parallel universe where nothing makes sense.