Hacking Your Way to a Better Tomorrow

Dave the Dork

Hey everyone! Great to see so many faces in here tonight. Or should I say great to see so many passwords in here? Because let’s be honest, half of you probably just googled 'how to hack my neighbor’s Wi-Fi' to find your way here!

Dave the Dork

So, I recently learned about Google Dork commands. Anyone here familiar? No? Well, it’s like being Sherlock Holmes, but instead of solving mysteries, you're just looking for unsecured webcams to watch people's cats. Because who needs Netflix when you have live streams of Fluffy trying to catch a laser pointer, am I right?

Dave the Dork

And then there's searching for sensitive files. Ever tried to look up 'filetype:pdf "confidential"'? It's like playing hide and seek with government secrets! Just be careful—one minute you’re trying to download a recipe for lasagna, and the next minute you’re on the FBI’s watch list for looking up 'how to steal a nuclear submarine.'

Dave the Dork

I once tried to use a Google Dork to find music. Do you know what I found? A whole bunch of MP3s labeled 'free download.' And I thought, 'Oh great! Now I can finally DJ my own party!' Turns out, my playlist was just a collection of songs that got artists sued. Thanks, Google! Now I’m a playlist criminal!

Dave the Dork

Raise your hand if you've ever accidentally clicked on something you shouldn’t have online! Yep, most of us! One click and you’re in the deep web looking for black market catnip. Or worse, you find those login pages! Suddenly, you’re staring at a screen like you just knocked on your ex's door and they answered! Awkward, right?

Dave the Dork

So folks, remember to use your newfound Google Dork skills responsibly. Ethical hacking is important! Let's all strive to be the Robin Hood of the internet: stealing from the rich, giving to the poor—and by poor, I mean the guy who can’t figure out how to use his smartphone. Thank you, and don’t forget to check your neighbor’s Wi-Fi password on the way out!