My First Day at School

Da-Wei

Friends, Romans, countrymen, lend me your ears... and maybe a chiropractor! Today, we're talking about my first day at school – a day so traumatic, I still have nightmares!

Lao-Zhang

So, tell us about this 'traumatic' day. Did you struggle with the school uniform?

Da-Wei

Uniform? That's nothing! My backpack weighed more than a small car! I swear, it contained a miniature replica of the solar system. Every book, every pencil, every extra-curricular activity that the school could possibly offer!

Lao-Zhang

A whole solar system? Did you have a space helmet in there?

Da-Wei

Almost! I had to leave my spacesuit at home, it didn't fit in the backpack. It was that big!

Lao-Zhang

And the teacher? Was she as terrifying as your backpack?

Da-Wei

She looked like Miss Honey from Matilda, all sweet and gentle. Then she started reciting Shakespeare. In Klingon!

Lao-Zhang

Klingon? Seriously?

Da-Wei

Seriously! I thought I was going to be beamed up by the Borg!

Lao-Zhang

And what about lunch? Was it edible?

Da-Wei

Edible? It was a bio-weapon! I think it was designed to repel invaders. It certainly repelled me from eating it again.

Lao-Zhang

So bad, huh? What did they serve?

Da-Wei

Let’s just say, it looked like something a mad scientist cooked up in a laboratory... and tasted even worse!

Lao-Zhang

And the grand finale?

Da-Wei

Oh, that’s a long story. Let's just say I almost accidentally triggered a school-wide evacuation. And it involved a science experiment.

Lao-Zhang

A science experiment? Seriously? What did you do?

Da-Wei

Let's just say it involved baking soda, vinegar, and a very enthusiastic attempt at making a volcano. It wasn't quite the eruption I envisioned, but it certainly got everyone's attention!

Lao-Zhang

And how did you make friends on this eventful day?

Da-Wei

Well, let's just say my attempts were... explosive. I accidentally set off the fire alarm trying to impress a girl with my amazing yo-yo skills.

Lao-Zhang

A yo-yo? I am speechless.

Da-Wei

It was a very advanced yo-yo. With fire. And a small rocket booster. Long story.

Lao-Zhang

Well, folks, that's the story of my friend Da-Wei's first day at school. A day I’m sure he’ll never forget. What about your first day? Anyone have a similar experience? Let's hear about it!

Da-Wei

Yeah, and remember kids, always check your backpack for miniature planets before embarking on your first day… just in case!