From Kings to Codex: A Roman Rollercoaster

John

Welcome, everyone! Today we’re diving into the Roman legal system. Yes, that’s right, the Romans—people who thought it was a good idea to write laws on stone tablets! Talk about heavy reading!

Jane

And can you imagine living under the Roman Monarchy? Seven kings, all with their own set of unwritten laws. It was like playing a game of telephone, but instead of whispers, you ended up with life-or-death situations!

John

Right? Everyone's just hoping they don’t accidentally offend a king by misplacing their sandals. God forbid you owe a debt! They could just say, 'Well, time to split you into pieces!'

Jane

How many of you think modern-day debt collection is tough? Raise your hands! Now imagine if your creditors could legally carve your body up for payment. Talk about a painful way to settle scores!

John

The Twelve Tables introduced so many weird rules. Like, if your neighbor’s sheep eats your garden, you can sue them for damages! I mean, can you imagine the court cases? 'Yes, Your Honor, the sheep clearly had a vendetta!'

Jane

And then we moved to the Republic, which was like a terrible reality TV show. Everyone trying to be the best ‘magistrate’, while the Senate was basically just the audience shouting, 'You’re doing it wrong!'

John

And let’s not forget Justinian! He decided to codify all these crazy laws into one big book. Some say it was for clarity; I say it was to make lawyers weep. 'Look! I’ve condensed chaos into bureaucracy!'

Jane

In the end, Roman law has left its mark, influencing modern law while reminding us how far we've come. Remember, as thankful as we are for not being split into pieces for debts, let’s also appreciate that our laws are just as confusing—but at least they come with a side of due process!